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I\u2019ve been feeling burnt out about work, and so I recently forced myself to spend a weekend untethered from my phone, not checking email, and not responding to calls. The two days felt longer than normal, I didn\u2019t miss anything important, and I emerged on Monday morning refreshed \u2013 so much so that I\u2019m thinking of making it part of my regular routine.<\/p>\n
The experience made me wish that it were possible to do something similar with diabetes \u2013 to just take a break<\/em>. But, as I complained to my husband, that\u2019s just not possible; as we all know, there\u2019s simply no way (without the risk of high or low blood sugar) to just take a weekend \u201coff.\u201d You can\u2019t hire a babysitter for your diabetes and have a romantic dinner out. You can\u2019t take a vacation to a tropical island and leave diabetes at home (and if you\u2019re anything like me, diabetes and tropical drinks are a recipe for disaster to begin with).<\/p>\n So what can <\/em>you do?<\/strong><\/p>\n I\u2019ve been doing a lot of thinking about this, especially since I am way too much of a control freak to come anywhere close to ignoring my blood sugar or rebelling against diabetes by eating a box of donuts. And, I came up with what for me might be a partial solution. It occurred to me that perhaps instead of trying to give myself space by ignoring <\/em>diabetes \u2013 which would be self-destructive \u2013 I might be able to tackle my diabetes burnout from a side angle: perhaps if I could clear out some of the junk in other areas of my life, I\u2019d have the mental space to take care of my diabetes without feeling quite so overwhelmed. Following this logic, I\u2019m trying to find ways to be nicer to myself \u2013 to sleep late when I need to, to work in the garden instead of answering emails \u2013 in hopes that in so doing, I\u2019ll clear out some emotional space for myself.<\/p>\n It\u2019s a work in progress, but I\u2019m liking the approach. In case it\u2019s of use, here are some ideas I\u2019ve come up with so far.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 1. Allow yourself to feel burned out.<\/strong> I remember a moment soon after I moved to California for graduate school where I felt so lonely and overwhelmed that I sat down on a curb and cried. (This was in Berkeley, where emoting in public is not just accepted, but often condoned.) At first, I tried to stop myself, but then I realized something: I had just moved 3,000 miles across the country, away from my friends, my parents, my grandmother, and my community. I felt ungrounded, disoriented and alone. It made sense <\/em>for me to want to cry.<\/p>\n I try to remember that when I start feeling exhausted about diabetes: I (and probably you if you\u2019re reading this) have a lifelong, chronic, incurable disease that requires constant daily effort to manage. It makes sense to feel burnt out!<\/em> If you try to fight that feeling \u2013 if you feel bad about feeling bad — you will only make yourself feel worse.<\/strong> There are times when it\u2019s useful to put a positive spin on diabetes (for example, thinking things like, \u201cDiabetes makes me eat healthier!\u201d or my favorite, \u201cAt least I don\u2019t have cancer!\u201d). But there are also times when it\u2019s useful to acknowledge the fact that you have a shitty and exhausting disease. In fact, I think it\u2019s essential to do so from time to time \u2013 because when you tell yourself things that all amount to \u201cit\u2019s not such a big deal,\u201d you\u2019re not respecting the part of yourself that works really hard, every day, to take care of your diabetes. It\u2019s okay to feel tired. It\u2019s okay to feel angry. It\u2019s okay to cry. \u00a0While it sounds counterintuitive, chances are that if you allow yourself to feel bad about diabetes once in a while, you\u2019ll emerge feeling better.<\/p>\n \u00a02. Nurture yourself.<\/strong> This sounds silly and trite, but I\u2019m serious. If you\u2019re anything like me, you spend your day running around (or, too often, sitting around) trying to keep up with all the responsibilities of your life. My days tend to blur into endless cycles of working, emailing, exercising and sleeping \u2013 and while I always seem to be able to make time for an extra phone call or responsibility, I am extremely bad at making time for myself. I\u2019ve been trying to change that and, while it might not seem directly related to diabetes, I think that consciously nurturing myself gives me more strength to cope. For example, I\u2019ve started going to an acupuncturist \u2013 not because I believe in the idea of qi (the life force that supposedly is running through your body), but because having needles stuck into my body forces me to be still (in a lovely, dark room) for at least 30 minutes till the acupuncturist takes them out. (Let\u2019s put aside for a moment what the fact that I require puncture wounds in order to be still has to say about my personality.) \u00a0Needles not your thing? Then find something that is \u2013 maybe it\u2019s coffee with a friend, or a special meal, or even just an hour (or ten minutes!) totally to yourself. Whatever it is, make sure you put it on your calendar, and give it the same weight as you would a doctor\u2019s appointment, or a meeting with your boss.<\/p>\n 3. Slow down other parts of your life.<\/strong> Depending on your situation, this may take different forms \u2013 but the general idea is to give yourself more breathing space in your non-diabetes life and, in so doing, a better ability to cope. In addition to trying not to check my email over the weekend, I\u2019m trying to get back into playing the piano and reading books, both of which require me to entirely focus on what I\u2019m doing, rather than be sucked into the instant gratification (and ultimately ungratifying) world of the internet. I\u2019ve also been trying to meditate for 10 to 15 minutes each morning instead of reaching instinctively for my iPhone. There are plenty of other little ways to do this \u2013 for example, the next time you\u2019re waiting for someone or something, try just paying attention to your surroundings rather than checking your email. Stare blankly out of windows once in a while. Not every moment needs to be filled \u2013 in fact, having some empty space can lead to calm. And if you feel more calm in other areas of your life, chances are diabetes won\u2019t seem quite so overwhelming.<\/p>\n 4. I\u2019ve also found mindfulness meditation to be a very useful coping tool for diabetes.<\/strong> (I\u2019ve written more about it here<\/a> and here<\/a>.) As you\u2019ve probably already gathered, I find great value in the whole \u201csitting still and concentrating on the moment\u201d thing. But the other thing I like about mindfulness is its emphasis on non-judgment. Because as we all know, diabetes is a disease of constant judgment. Imagine what it would be like if you could see a crappy number on your glucometer screen and, instead of thinking of it as crappy, could just think of it as . . . a number. Maybe it\u2019s not the number you want it to be, but it\u2019s just a number, and there\u2019s no way you can prevent it from occurring, because it has already occurred. So why beat yourself up about it? Instead, focus on what you can do to influence the next <\/em>number. Diabetes \u2013 and life \u2013 is constantly changing; nothing stays still. Beating yourself up over the past \u2013 and worrying about the future — is useless. It\u2019s the moment that counts.<\/p>\n 5. Sometimes the tools that I use to manage my diabetes can themselves become overwhelming \u2013 and that sometimes it\u2019s useful to take a break.<\/strong> I\u2019m not suggesting that you throw your blood glucose meter in a closet and exist on donuts for a week. But I do know people who find it useful once in a while to take a \u201cpump vacation\u201d and go back to shots for a few days, just to feel what it\u2019s like to be untethered. (They then usually return to the pump once they have remembered how annoying multiple daily injections can be!) I occasionally will not immediately replace my continuous glucose monitor sensor when it fails \u2013 or I put it on vibrate during the day so that I\u2019m not constantly hearing its beeps. (Anyone else have a specific stress reaction to particular beeps? When a truck backs up, I get an adrenaline rush.)<\/p>\n \u00a06. Read Diabetes Burnout<\/em><\/a>, by William Polonsky.<\/strong> Seriously. You are not weird or weak for feeling burned out, and Polonsky has some great stories and tips. \u00a0You can pre-order Ginger Vieira’s new book, Dealing with Diabetes Burnout<\/a>.<\/p>\nHealthy, Non-Self-Destructive Techniques to Cope with Diabetes Burnout (An Incomplete List):<\/strong><\/h2>\n