As I head to the lab for a blood test this morning for my endo appointment next week, I’m reminded of how I used to approach my three month blood test. One hour of exercise first, then off for the test, to make sure that my daily sugar was low. It was sort of gaming the test, a sign that I feared not only a ‘bad’ result but what the doctor would see as a ‘bad’ result. And because I had big denial issues about my type 2 diabetes, a ‘bad’ result meant a ‘bad me’.
Maybe it’s age, but all of that has changed. Being older than my doctor helps:). Or maybe I’m actually more accepting of my diabetes, which means that I also accept the readings as my body simply signaling where I am on the spectrum of high or low, not good or bad. Today, I simply head to the lab after waking up, without the ‘prep’ of exercise, convinced that the reading – whatever it is — will simply be an indicator of today’s path. And that goes for the A1C as well. It will give me a snapshot of how I’ve been doing over the past few months, not a judgment on my behavior or, for that matter, anything else.
Having a chronic disease is tough enough without looking to it for moral guidance.