Diet Pepsi: According to my past review of sodas, I have not yet covered the important topic of Diet Pepsi.  What a shocking oversight!  Anyway, I am taking a sip of it right now.  …Hmm.  It tastes pretty much like Diet Coke.  So, in other words, like sugar-water mixed with crushed-up aspirin, except it’s slightly sweeter than Diet Coke. I feel like I’m running out of clever words with which to describe diet sodas, and that’s a concern.  In other news, I currently work part-time at a wine store, and all I ever do is...

Coca-Cola: I love the fact that Coke-Cola has managed to tie itself into the concept of “America,” and waving flags, and the 4th of July, and…  polar bears.  And such.  And hey!  Do you remember their old ad campaign?  “Coke Is It.”  That slogan always cracked me up.  It’s vague, and yet ridiculously imposing at the same time.  Coke…  is IT.  Wow.  The slogan may as well be, “SUBMIT TO COKE, NOW,” or, “DID YOU THINK THERE WAS ANOTHER OPTION BESIDES COKE?  BAW HA HA HA HA HA!  PATHETIC FOOLISH SLAVES!” Anyway… ...