After putting it off for a week I went to do my blood test on Monday morning. This morning I got the results and I feel like I a failure. I was expecting my HbA1c to be higher than my last result but somehow I hoped it wouldn’t be that far off. After improving my HbA1c in two consecutive blood tests, going from 6.8 to 6.3 and then to 6%, I found myself this morning staring at the results on my computer in disbelief. My A1c is 6.8 again. I thought I was off to a new start and now I find myself back where I was 9 months ago. When I got my last result three months ago, I was so happy. I felt as if I accomplished something great (silly but true). Today I feel like a failure (even after a very good morning run).
Pleased with the success of my last two results I had promised myself, even made a new year’s resolution that I would continue to do better. I want my HbA1c to be under 6.
But sometimes things are easier said than done. Instead of continuing to closely monitor what I eat, checking blood sugar levels often, I’ve let myself go a little. My training called for an increase in the amount of carbohydrates I ate, which should have been accompanied by tighter control. But it seems success went to my head.
What makes diabetes so hard is that it just never ends. There is no off-season or time for a break. Unlike endurance training there is no post race break. When you get the results of your latest blood work you’re already running the next race.
So, just like after a disappointing marathon, it’s time to get back on track and try to do better, learning from mistakes and trying not to make them again.
Next time, three months from now, I hope to be in a better mood with a result I can be proud of.
Hey Mike!
I often think that things get tighter and tighter as we get down closer to target. You know – a little bit of work yields huge payoffs when your A1C is much higher, but as you get down lower it takes more work, more risk, and you see less change. Keep plugging away man, as they say, it’s a marathon not a sprint, right?
Mike, keep in mind that you are keeping your blood sugar low to avoid the development of those sugar mediated complications that are the real issues with modern diabetes. Your numbers indicate that you are doing a great job. I attribute it to your discipline. An H1c of 6.0 is less than 6.8 but as far as developing retinopathy (for example) is concerned you are essentially blocking its development. One of my classmates in graduate school took great pride in getting just enough of a good grade to pass but no more than that. His reasoning was that unless the… Read more »
i know how you feel… but keep in mind that many people would be thrilled with anything under 7. also, the A1C is not a perfect test…. you can be at 6.8 with many highs and lows, averaging out, or be at 6.8 with more consistent normal numbers. So it’s good to look at other factors, like if you are staying active, eating well and avoiding crazy highs and lows.
But i don’t mean to minimize your disappointment, my A1C definitely impacts my mood!